Wednesday, June 24, 2009

If you're keeping score at home

In the race for "you have to be fucking kidding me", 'home' started out in typical fashion with the Wee One busting up her nose and the theft of our GPS device from our car in our driveway, the day before I left. 'Away' was not to be outdone, however, and broke out the "loss of important keys" card at the very inception of the trip. Then, out of no where, 'away' upped the ante and threw in "searched by someone with the authority to jail and/or fine" today, but it was an empty threat in the end, as neither jail nor fine were incurred. Buoyed by the challenge, 'home' decided to go for pay dirt and broke out the "your child was bitten three times at day care by the child of people you work with and there's not a damn thing you can do from across the country" gauntlet. Only two days in and the 'home' and 'away gremlins are hard at work, coming up with new and imaginative ways to fuck with me while I am traveling. Luckily there is still time, so naturally it's time to place bets. The odds are below and there is no limit to the number of bets, but the house caps total moneys for an individual at $100K.

10 to 1 minor failure of service at home (electrical, phone, appliance)
20 to 1 minor vehicular issue away (engine failure, flat tire)
50 to 1 massive act of nature at home (flooded basement, tree fall involving house or car, lightning)
100 to 1 Natural disaster away (earthquake, forest fire)
234 to 1 Famine (home or away)
382 to 1 Pestilence (home or away)
592 to 1 Plague (home or away)

8 comments:

  1. Can I get 2 to 1 on nothing else major happens? $2 ftw

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  2. Sorry Anon, the action against that was so heavy that Vegas took it off the board.

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  3. If it was me, the odds would be 5 to 1 that I suffered a catastrophic physical injury.

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  4. Gotta pick up my jaw from the floor...cannot believe this whirlwind of bad luck you are currently experiencing! Sheesh!

    Well, the wheel has got to spin into the good luck zone soon! Hoping it happens soon...

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  5. I've got 10 bucks on massive act of nature at home and 5 on natural disaster away. (I never win money gambling unless it's on the ponies so I think that by placing these bets that should probably ensure that neither one will happen to you on this trip.)

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  6. I'll place last night's poker winnings ($15 Canadian) on "trapped in house by escaped tiger from local zoo", either home OR away. What are the odds please?

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  7. Cath, I'll need to measure the distance to the local zoo in each location, calculate the traveling time of a tiger and work out the likelihood ratios of said tiger lingering outside either house. Maybe I'll make a figure....

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  8. Waah! Cos of Challenge's (our fave female swede blogger) luck I want $20 on natural disaster. Three days before she left her vacation back home a fucking tree fell on her house >:)

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